Kanye strikes again!

Dealing with a heckler is perhaps the most unpleasant thing about being a stand up comic. This is how I would’ve responded to Kanye if he had hopped on stage and heckled me last night.

- Real tough of you to come on stage, Kanye! I’d be scared, except I have made a policy of never being scared of a man that undergoes three costume changes over the course of three hours.

- Very nice of Yoko Ono of to lend you her sunglasses for the evening.

- Great insult. Did you make that up yourself or did you sample it from a better insult from 20 years ago?

- Cool haircut. It looks like the design on my ikea comforter.

- I’d take the mic back, but I like my Tcell count just the way it is, thank you.

- We have a special name for people that hate on 17 year old girls where I’m from, Kanye. We call them: “other 17 year old girls.”

I’m sure I’ll take it all back when his next hit comes out. In the meantime, however, it’s mean time for Mr. West.

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