Last night I went to my usual open mic here in San Francisco after about a two month hiatus, and my how things have changed! Or rather, reverted. Allow me to explain.

When I first started going to this open mic (I’ve been going for about nine months now), my friends and I were at the bottom of the ladder. We were regularly ‘bumped’ for more established comedians or friends of the hosts (even if they sucked); people rarely stayed to listen to our sets; and hardly anyone spoke to us. It was rough. It was demoralizing. But for the club, I can see how it was a pretty good screening process. Random people off the street who aren’t serious about comedy wouldn’t last too long under the conditions, and therefore wouldn’t suck valuable stage time and audience stamina from the people who were trying to legitimately hone their craft.

After about a month of sticking it out, though, things began to change. We got to know some people. They started watching our sets. We stopped getting bumped. We started getting booked in showcases. And, of course, we got better. That’s what happens when you pay your dues, right? You get in the club.

Last night, though… someone pulled the rug out from under us.

The normal MC was gone, and his replacement - someone who we’ve seen there a bunch of times, who my pal Donny has actually performed with in showcases, and generally someone who should know who we are - for some reason treated us like beginners. We got bumped til basically the end of the show, when there were about four people in the audience. We even got bumped for a dude who earlier in the night had been implicated in some sort of rape scandal (seriously… it’s a long story). The dudes who we got bumped for took well over their alotted five minutes, and pretty much used the time to just have a casual conversation with their friends in the audience.

On top of that, the MC introduced Donny by saying, “Wow, I really have nothing to say about this guy,” and me by saying, “A very funny woman.” Let me tell you something, internet people: I HATE being introduced as a very funny woman, and I’ve been hard pressed to find a female comedian who doesn’t. Dude, I have boobs. People will figure out I’m a woman once I get onstage. Do you really think the audience needs that much preparation? Just once I’d like to see a comedian introduced as, “One of my favorite male comedians…”

So as I sat there stewing in my own righteous indignation and entitlement, I thought back to my early days
of getting bumped and bombing in front of the four people left in the club, and instead of feeling angry, I resolved to feel grateful. Grateful that, for the most part, nights like that are behind me. Grateful that when things like that happen to me now, it’s not just my close friends who smell the bullshit.

And, of course, grateful for my admin privileges on rooftop so I can change that MC’s bio pic to this.

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